Fictional local satire. Inspired by the hail and thunder experienced around Durban’s Upper Highway on 27 October 2026. This is a made-up detective story, with imaginary investigators and absolutely no secret weather intelligence. We hope everyone is safe and drying out.
The Upper Highway received a very unusual water delivery: individually frozen portions, dropped from a considerable height, with no delivery note and nobody willing to sign for them.
Naturally, Tank’D Water Solutions opened a completely fictional investigation.
Its code name? Operation Upper Hailway: The Case of the Melting Evidence.
A suspiciously efficient disappearance
The theory is simple. A secret weather machine beneath the Valley of a Thousand Hills has been switched on by a committee that cannot agree on the thermostat setting.
One member wanted rain. Another wanted dramatic lighting. The third thought “ice dispenser” sounded more premium.
The result was a delivery that left our imaginary investigators with a serious problem. Every time they labelled a piece of evidence, it turned into a puddle.
“We had seventeen exhibits,” complained our entirely fictional chief detective. “Now we have a damp table and somebody’s lunch container.”
Follow the gutters
Over at The Wood Joint, the rooftop monkeys have already been identified as undercover site inspectors. We have been asked to investigate what happens after the evidence reaches the gutters.
Our fictional surveillance team observed the following suspicious sequence: water moved off a roof, entered a downpipe and disappeared into a tank.
No dramatic getaway. No helicopter. Just a green tank, standing there looking innocent.
Beside it sat a vervet monkey in a raincoat, holding a clipboard marked “Nothing to see here”. He declined to answer questions, although he did inspect our sandwiches.
The lead detective immediately requested a bigger evidence container. Somebody suggested a water tank. The meeting briefly became a sales consultation.
The committee’s fatal mistake
They had forgotten that Upper Highway residents will photograph absolutely anything unusual happening in the garden.
In our imaginary neighbourhood group, one hailstone was compared with a marble, then a golf ball, then “definitely bigger than the one Dave sent”. A banana appeared for scale. The monkey inspector confiscated it.
By the time the committee ordered a cover-up, all the evidence had melted. Unfortunately, the screenshots were permanent.
The real bit: make a plan for the rain
Away from the fictional weather machine, a downpour can prompt a useful question: would a rainwater harvesting system suit your property?
Tank’D Water Solutions helps with rainwater harvesting and municipal backup water systems. The right starting point is what you want the water system to do, the space available and how the installation will fit your property.
If you would like to explore the options, get in touch through Tank’D Water Solutions with your suburb and what you have in mind.
We cannot control when the sky delivers. We can help you plan what happens to the rain.
Finish this sentence on our Facebook page: “You know you live in the Upper Highway when a storm…” We suspect the neighbourhood has better material than our detective department.
Until next time, keep your sense of humour. And if a monkey asks to inspect your tank, request identification.
Operation Upper Hailway is a fictional humour series from Tank’D Water Solutions and The Wood Joint. The accompanying cartoon is AI-generated.
